Do you ever start to feel trapped by your life? It could geographically, financially, socially, or occupationally. It’s probably the feeling I hate most. It eats at me and winds me up so that it’s all I can think about. And the more you try to figure it out the more you realize there is nothing you can do.
Since I can count the number of people that read my blog on one hand, you all at least know the generalities of my situation. I haven’t had a permanent job since December 2008 when I go laid off after playing Santa for co-workers’ kids in the office Christmas party. (Keep it classy former employer.) That means no paid time off, no health care, no retirement contributions nothing in the last two and a half years of my life. It’s infuriating. For me, anyway, it makes me wonder if there will ever be a way to climb out. It’s easy for some of my less empathetically inclined friends to say, “why don’t you just move?” All that does is tell me they have no idea what they are talking about.
All I can think of is moving out of my current geographical area. It’s overpriced, the financial services industry is dead and most likely will never be meaningfully resurrected here again, and it’s basically a black hole for a young person’s life. Moving requires the ability to save. You have to pay for movers or the U-Haul to do it yourself. You have to have first and lasts month’s rent, etc. If people could “just move” then believe me, more people would. But for someone who is in my situation, and I know there are others, you just start to feel crushed.
I frequently meet people who don’t realize how lucky they have it. Or have a skewed perspective on what they have achieved themselves and what roads were paved for them by others. You’re probably thinking, the same could be said for me, which is true to a degree. I grew up in a household with two parents who gave me everything they could and helped me in anyway possible. And that is something I’m eternally appreciative of. But I frequently meet people who take for granted family connections, parents’ credit cards, familial financial security, etc. and think that they have had the same issues as me. Some of that is because where I live suffers from a severe case of townyism. Many people haven’t really ever lived anywhere else or spend considerable time in another part of the country or world. My city is a pretty insular place and unless you are really lucky or well connected in some way, it’s really hard to make it here. There are many people who have the smarts, talent, ability, and experience to be successful here, but with a population that is predominantly from here taking up whatever jobs there are, it leaves little room for new people to move in. Ultimately, it just creates a very walled off environment that can often be out of touch with reality and suffer from imaginary victim-hood.
Another terrible thing is that I know I’m not the only one. There are 20-somethings all across the country that are in similar situations. They graduated college, went off somewhere thinking they’d be forever employed only to get thrown out on their asses in a couple years because of political corruption and affluent greed. And now our government is paralyzed by partisan bullshit that makes me want to jump off a bridge. Wages haven’t increased for the bottom 80% or so in 30 years. Meanwhile they’ve doubled several times over for the most affluent. And the smaller the percentage at the top the more their salary has increased relative to the rest of Americans. And now those Americans are out of work, homes, and life. I’m not talking about the idiots that bought five houses and took out three mortgages. I’m talking about the people who watched it happen and either didn’t realize what was going on or had no power to stop it. The collateral damage.
Republicans don’t want Americans to understand what the debt ceiling really is. They have the utmost faith in private business to do everything. At its best you can call it naïveté and it’s worst corrupt. There is no demand to get the economy going again. Tax cuts don’t create demand. Tax cuts don’t create jobs. Poor people hardly get any money back and if they do it goes to helping pay for bills, rent, or medical care. Rich people aren’t buying another yacht, Mercedes, or designer shoes because they either don’t need any more or it doesn’t matter because they aren’t made in the US anyway. The biggest customer the US economy has is the US government. It’s simple Keynesian economics. Because common Americans can’t afford to buy anything and stimulate demand that way, the government needs to step in. That means building things. Investing in things Americans can make or develop better than other countries. That means a short-term increase in the national debt with a long-term aim on paying it down which means means-testing for social security (I still don’t understand why this is so controversial), a national health care system, and reduced deductions, tax loopholes and subsidies for corporations. It means all of those things and more.
But instead, as a country, are trapped. I look at the Republican presidential candidates and they are all jokes. Not one of them can be taken seriously. Have we not had our fill of privatizing, evangelical Christians who want to privatize everything but social policy? I wish there was a strong, serious candidate because then Obama would be challenged mentally, philosophically, and politically. Instead we have the same tried and failed Republican ideas with an extra dash of crazy thrown in. It is completely demoralizing.
And when I look at all that going on in our country’s leadership, I wonder how the hell I am ever going to have a career, move and live somewhere more appealing to me, and become financially secure in my present and my future. Instead I’m trapped in a city I don’t like, doing temporary jobs between stints on unemployment, and living paycheck to paycheck. Meanwhile, employers aren’t hiring anyone that has been unemployed for too long, wages are falling, and my generation will be forever behind in lifetime achievement and earnings because of it. I look at our politicians, Supreme Court justices and the CEOs of Wall Street, oil, and big business, and I honestly can’t find a bone in my body that wouldn’t mind if they all died tomorrow. Otherwise, I don’t know how young people are ever going to have a fighting chance in this country or world when the old, connected and corrupt are methodically destroying it and us.